Aoril 26, 2015

The sleep wasn’t as good last night…the cool fan was on, but I had kicked off the fleece blanket and so much of the night was spent shivering.  Still, once I re-discovered that fleece around 6, it was a nice ride.  This time,  I knew there was coffee in the lobby, rather than spend $4 across the street, so I made good use of that.  My tea had been placed in Scott’s car last night before the show and he had forgotten to drop it off after he loaded up all his gear.  I had told him I would drop by his place around 11 to pick it up, so I needed to get moving.  I showered and then…breakfast.

Pier 15 is a cute little restaurant on the…piers in San Rafael. <duh.  Chances are it's on Pier 15, too>.   I came here last Mother Hips TXR shows with Samantha and Kristina and it is quite tasty.  The morning was one of those simply perfect mornings: the temperature ideal, people talking as they ate with one another.  I enjoyed a open bay shrimp omelet with avocado as Madonna sang “Borderline” through the speakers.  That was my theme song for running for student council in Junior High.  I’m not exactly sure with the correlation was, but I lost, so clearly no one else did, either.

I headed to Scott’s house in beautiful Marin county…only the house wasn’t there..it didn’t exist.  I knew he had punched in a wrong number, texted him and waited, but I knew that damn homework was just sitting there, mocking me thus I headed home.  I needed to stop by Lindsay and Tony’s for a scobie – I am bound and determined to get my kombucha aging past  the second fermentation.  We hung out for a bit and had  great talks about music, life, life-in-music…I love these people I have met through the Mother Hips.

Once at home, my pups were very happy to see me.  I knew that in a perfect world, I would load them up ad we’d go hiking, but again, that dark cloud loomed over my shoulder.  2 more essays for my final, plus a little extra and I would be done with class work.  I am not going to lie.  I watched the Hips videos at least 4 times.  The video Jay Blakesberg put out of the guys playing the space in Magazine was KILLER.  Eventually, though, I got it finished.  All of it.  Not my best work, but my brain is lagging.  I will have 3 case studies and then the 20 page Cap Stone to do for practicum, but that will happen (hopefully) this summer.  

This weekend was a reaffirmation of my love of the music life.  It doesn’t happen every time, but once in a while, there is an incredible music set and the most perfect set of circumstances which make the night unforgettable.  I believe I am going to get tickets to the Wildflower festival in Chico, 2 weeks from now.  It’s just a one day gathering in that fun little town.  CRB is on the 5^th, Hipnic on the 14-16, Calpine in June, possible Grateful Dead end of June then High Sierra.  Then vacation with my kids!  Shit – the good stuff for all this work I’ve done is coming at once….  I kinda like that.  

Pictures:  They are everywhere.  :); This is the tea I am giving Thunes grief about - it is SO good!; Show shots

April 25, 2015

I couldn't stop watching Forensic Files last night....this is a key reason why tv service is gone at our house. The night's sleep was a beautiful one and I forced sleep until 9, knowing there were a 2 issues: I'd have to go across the street for coffee and down to the lobby to figure out why WiFi wasn't working.  Plus, the day's plans were homework.  I wasn't looking forward to that.

The coffee was delish & the firewall issue was fixed, so!  <blank stare>. I managed to scrape out one of three essays, and get started on the second, but this was killing me. My brain felt like chicken fat and there were too many distractions.  I tried, I texted, I responded, I napped. Then I gave up.  Decided to focus on helping my broken back, instead and took a hot bath after some stretching and a head stand.  It was time to get ready.

I dress like an eleven year old boy.  It’s pathetic.  I have about as much sexuality oozing from me as an inflamed mosquito bite.  Tonight was no exception.  Jeans (I didn’t bring anything else and I have yet to learn how to wear sassy slacks or whatever those lady-pants are called), my Kombi Haus Tshirt and my Merrill Barefoot shoes.  Gross.  I walked to a nearby Persian restaurant and enjoyed a lovely dinner and The Most Amazing Persian tea…so much so I had to speak to the owner, a lovely man, who sold me a bag of it.  The experience was lovely – Persian food, listening to French music, and hearing Farsi spoke.,  Made me realize how very much I am inspired by other cultures.

Off to Terrapin Crossroads.  I walked in and almost immediately headed to the same seat I was in yesterday when I saw a friend who told me I had to come sit up front, which I did.  Soon we had a little sit-in going on in the front as other people realized the brilliance of it and joined us.  I had forgotten Hips were doing a double set tonight….And soon, but not soon enough, they began – an acoustic set initially.  I saw that “Motorhome” was on the set list, as my heart began to pound.  Oh GAWD…I look like a boy!  My hair is stupid…this is terrible!  And then…Tim announced that it was dedicated to his cousin Cheri and Whitey.  <my heart was crushed.>  Well, shit.  Another rejection.  This one completely imaginary and created, but still…  

The second set was wicked.  I had a spazz woman next to me and so help me jezus, I had this strong desire to deck her, but I didn’t.  A friend I was standing near mentioned that it could be worse – we could have that woman standing next to us.  She was doing things with the rope that reminded us of those weight band machines.  Oh, sweet mercy.  That’s why I like fests, better, particularly Hipnic.  After the show, Cheri and Whitey showed me and Tim’s parents their new motorhome.  Man, alive…  makes my Lizzie look not so fancy, though she has stttyyllleee…..  <smile>  A walk home in the chilly air, where I met a man who had just gotten off work.  We talked a while as we walked, then he went his way and I went mine.  An episode of Forensic Files tonight and sleep.  Tomorrow to SF before home…and finishing that damn final.

Pictures: My solution for my back; Bowling fun on the walk to TXR; The death of another innocent frond on the walk home.

April 24, 2015

Up early and I still really didn’t get much packed.  I’m going to a Hips show…jeans and a Tshirt.  I’m not that fancy dresser, which is why my pant suit for December's show was a big deal to me. School was interesting.. playing a card game with a kid with Apserger’s and then trying to explain the rules when there is disagreement…so we switched to Farkle, which was an absolute blast.  Many dry jokes made and two games lost by me; it was so worth it.

After work, I headed straight out to San Rafael via a new direction and I saw, quite probably, the most incredible thing I have seen in a long time.  A Cadillac which was lifted and most probably had hydraulics, it had been converted into a funky convertible top and a black woman with one hell of a hairdo was driving.  I really wanted to meet her because I bet your ass this was one hell of a woman.  The Richmond Bridge has never been explored by me, and I saw a beautiful new area for discoveries.  These are areas I wish I had someone to explore with…I’ll grab my kids and the bus and make this a reality.

Pulled into San Rafael, and was ready for dinner, I found a little Mexican taqueria nearby, and while good, it wasn’t something I’ll go back for..except for maybe nachos..I should try those tonight.  I started my walk to Terrapin and stopped off  for gum.  Had an incredible conversation with the Mexican man there – what a kickass attitude he had.  I started my walk and a man in a white Honda, which had pulled into a driveway, pulled up an inch or two to let me pass…then he followed me and asked if I wanted to go for a ride.  Really?  Do I look like a hooker, in my jeans, cardigan and Converse shoes? He hung around for a bit, but when he saw I wasn’t biting, he took off.  I want to state here that I am extremely careful and aware of my surroundings when I walk:  I notice suspicious activity and walk with the utmost of confidence.  If anything where to happen, I’d burst into “If I were a Rich Man” from “Fiddler on the Roof” – no one ever seems to want to hear me sing, so I assume this a great deterrent.

Once there, I found my place in a seat against the back wall by the merch booth.  My back was hurting badly and I know Converse isn’t known for terrific foot support.  I felt horribly alone and starting kicking myself for doing this yet again, but this is all something I’ve done to myself.  My thought process is as such:  I felt horribly alone in the last years of marriage (about 8 years ago).  I felt horribly alone with the SoulMate, because he could not/would not follow his heart…I felt horribly alone with the man who was also terribly alone and tried to make something work which never would.  The bottom line is this:  “Relinquish outward attachments and affirm Divine freedom within.”  This is why I am on my trek to Be OK With Myself.  Seriously.  

I met the most wonderful woman at Terrapin.  She sat in the back with her husband and when I moved my chair to the other side of the table  (next to her – it was getting too crowded  by the booth), we started talking.  She is One of the Originals – she was at Woodstock, lived in Manhattan in the 60s and saw sooo many bands. Her name was Maryann and it was such a treat talking with her.  A petite little angel whom I hope to run into again someday.  I have gotten to know so many of these people who experienced music in the 60s and 70s – when legendary artists played for free because it wasn’t about profit, it was about Music.  It was an era that shall never be recaptured and I am grateful to hear these stories.  After the show (it had started raining), I walked back to the hotel, relishing the moisture and walking further to see if I could grab a bit to eat.  Another white car stopped for me (What the hell??!!) and then moved along.  I finally got back to my room, peeling the wet shoes and pants from my body.  Glorious day.

Pictures: Terrapin Crossroads; I wonder if this is the woman in the Caddy; Richmond Bridge; A snippet from "Mountain Time"...gawd, these guys rock.

April 23, 2015

My morning was dull (though I did crank some music…mostly Bob Marley and surely some Kill ‘Em All, I forget).  I can’t seem to get moving in terms of anything…my…strength..is..wavering.

The great thing is  we are on SBAC schedule again at work for additional testing.  That proved amusing.  First, a game of dodge ball for freshman/sophomores…and this is not the dodge ball of my day with everyone playing and one big pink bouncy ball.  It is 6 small yellow foam balls and a team of six players on each teams , which were generally comprised of testosterone-filled adolescent males –except for my student – who managed to stay in.  Then we headed to karaoke.  This was a show, indeed.  My chance at stardom and yet again, I failed.  To be honest, though, I doubted they had any Mother Hips song ready to go. <grin>  

School ended and off to the first group, an AOD with high schoolers.    This is where I belonged in high school <really> and how the hell I managed to get truly sober at 22 <first round>, I will never know.  I just got so damn tired of living in that chaotic hell.  What I had in my favor, though, is that pre-traumatic brain injury I had a relatively “stable” life, so I knew what that looked like…many of these kids do not and therefor have no point of reference.

Off to my weekly highpoint, nacho pickup, them to the second group.  *I must interrupt here and state that I was sadly disappointed with the nachos.  There was nothing different about them, but they didn’t meet my expectations and so…I am off chasing that nacho dragon again.*  Groups was longer than intended, but very necessary…it is really difficult to parent some children, sometimes.

Home later than expected..and nothing packed nor prepared for my weekend trip (I would like to leave directly from work), but it’s only a trip to San Rafael and I will be writing papers all day Saturday, so I don’t have any extra plans other than maybe go grab a bite to eat (the hotel has Wi-Fi, so I’m set).  Looking forward to this.

Pictures:  This is a selfie I took of myself  today.  You'll notice  I'm looking a bit stressed: 23 days, 23 days; A bag of sunflower seeds at group 1; This pink bag is nacho heaven, it's MY heaven. <giggle>