May 26, 2015

Morning time.  Automatically I went through the motions of what I have trained myself to do over the last --- years, but I am tired, ready to transition into the next phase (work, people, not  life).  I noticed that Raleigh, NC is listed as one of the top 3 stress-free cities in the US, so my mind was thinking…Olivia is there…it’s in the US <bad side>, but on the East Coast and great things were written about it.  Then I heard from Gio in Poland, asking about my move to CH 💕 and my heart remembered where it’s soul is.  Yeah.  I need to follow that.

 Today is the final regular  day as tomorrow is the last Dback schedule, then exam schedules Thursday and Friday.  Oh glory be –today is DONE!!  A little less than 18 hours….

I picked up my little offspring, who shall soon be taller than me.  They ran up to me and  their first words <I kid not> from both were “How was Hipnic?!”  Ohhh…has it been that long since I’ve seen them???  “Gloriousssss!!!!” I replied….”Oh, I miss it so much!  350 something days!”  My girl would fit in so well…so would my boy, maybe, though the music isn’t quite his style.  I had to get moving – much to do and a client soon…so we headed off to the bank.                     ***I would like to stop here and state a few  things:                                                                                               A) I wish I wasn’t such a drama queen

B) I really do make efforts when there is the thought of a hint of a possible relationship and I want to stop.

doing.

that.                                                                                                                                                         C) I am feeling the desire to withdraw from society (sorta) and simply post this blog without posting it on FB, so if you want a link: http://tribeoftrio.blogspot.com/  I might do it soon.                                                                                                            

I went to the bank.  One of my favorite tellers called me over, so  - despite feeling utterly foolish, I went ahead and asked about The Dude.  Because…I have to.  It turns out, of course, that he is very married and so now I feel horrible because of my attempts.  I am wanton, though not purposely…simply out of meeting few men I find appealing.  My two desires here are – that some dude who fits above description (appealing) comes up to me and starts talking to me and being very black and white, with hints of gray, because I sure as hell don’t know how to play this game and he will be upfront and honest.  My second desire is to say “fuck it” and stop giving a damn.  I have the feeling neither desire will pan out.

I dropped kids at home, headed to my client.  I have messed up badly and not been turning in the sheets which get the agency paid.  Penelope and I need to meet tomorrow.  After that I needed to go grab Mags, take her to her banquet, Ethan and I ate dinner and hit the store for milk, then we picked up Mags <who had injured herself on the playground, poor baby>.  Off to Walgreen’s – WHOSE PRICES ARE LESS THAN HALF FOR THE SAME RX I WAS GETTING AT WALMART.   Did you hear me???  LESS THAN HALF!!! <leave WM!!!  Leave it NOW!!>  At home, Ethan and I prepared some gifts for some special women at work whom I may not see anymore, “if I don’t return in the fall.” 

I just learned yesterday what this Mercury retrograde is, which is quite applicable to my self-thoughts right now, hence my desire to retreat (it happens a few times a year).  I’m exhausted…another 12 hours day out.  No wonder things are getting quite icky for me, lately. 

 Pictures:  Clean Out.  I need to in so many areas....; My boy; creating "thank you for being there"s.