December 22, 2014

I could’ve slept for days.  Not really, but I felt like if I’d been able to, I could have slept for days.  I was up around nine, and for an almost 2 a.m. bed time (damn Mario), that’s pretty good.  I spent the first couple oif hours posting my last 3 5-a-Days.  I spend an awful lot of time on that if I miss it.   I don’t understand how I used to type the whole thing on my phone.  It was rather cathartic, but there wasn’t a ispelling-icorrect issue the way there is now.  It isucks.

I needed to pick up Tribe around 1 and we were OFF! I warned them that there is a ton of work to get  down in the next 2 days since we’ll leave around 4 a.m. on the 26^th.   I had my appointment, so  I gave them chores to do while I was gone and I headed off.  I forgot my paperwork, but fortunately my site is next door, so I walked in and grabbed another.  Then off to the grocery store to get dipping chocolate and milk.  I noticed a lot of older women today with a great deal of makeup on, which caused me to ponder (of course it did).  When I was 17, I swore to all that was holy (at that age it was Motley Crue and Metallica) that I would never leave the house without makeup on.  Now, I’m too busy to bother putting on makeup most of the time.  I think, perhaps, when one is older, one has time again, yet I really should care for myself better than I do.  Maggie shot a video of me and Ethan tonight.  He kept tickling me, so I was whispering Mafioso-style threats in his ear (it was really quite funny).  My face is plain, I have so many facial expressions, I’m surprised I don’t have wrinkles all over, but I’m sure I’ll see the effects soon….

Once I got home from my Live Scan, I received a phone call from my sister which just about sent everything into a spiral hell again.  There is a lot going on right now with us in Texas and there are so many road blocks.  Time for the day’s jobs:  We needed to get the almonds started, we needed to get gifts for the upcoming-baby, I had planned to get the oil changed.  Because of time, oil change was moved to tomorrow so we stopped for food.  A favorite student works there, though she is on vacation, but we had fun.  There was, afterwards, some tension.  Both kids are in sensitive periods right now, literally, and M was in tears over words/actions she perceived as mean.  I was able to talk to her, explaining grabbed cellophane bags from the dollar store for the almonds.  Quick walk to Baskin-Robbins in the fog (it was very London-ish), then to a store to pickup baby clothes.  THAT was fun, but lordy, I’m too old for those things now.  

Home where we went into a chocolate almond with Himalayan or Hawaiian sea salt frenzy.  I had Hips playing loudly – I was dancing (back at GAMH!) and we had a good evening.  Ethan was out front playing with the dogs (good boy) and later he cut out the card stock tags I was making.  Maggie started wrapping gifts and I finished the packages.  Lots of work and a big list for tomorrow.  We get our tree tomorrow!!

Today I struggled a little bit.  Mags mentioned (and this is so cool because that’s how we roll as a Tribe) that my boobs looked huge and I hate that.  I hate how they hurt… I hate how my whole body is hurting.  I feel as if though I live in this bed on the computer and my physical life is suffering.  I am the largest, I believe, I have ever been in my life – barring, of course, pregnancy.  I miss being active.  I wish I had someone to be active with..just a buddy, mind you.  I’d love to climb again…something.  I bought a smudge stick today and will start that up again (And yes...yoga), then I’m ready to clear this house.  I’ll sell Ethan’s drums, some paintings, my motorcycle helmet.   It’s time to change.

Pictures:  Our lights on the old cherry tree; the results from tonight's hard work; the movie Maggie shot.  I thought she was on her Instagram account....