I am Ilona, I am Ali. I am Texas, I am California. I am
Switzerland, I am the States. I am ice, I am fire. I love my girl the best, I love my boy the best. I am a contraction of so many different things which live within me and are constantly at war. I am peace. Or at least, I strive for it.
Today was a difficult day, another Christmas alone. There was once a family who loved one another fiercely. Then it fragmented and continues to grow in hatred & hostility. I created another such family, and though we fragmented, we still love one another fiercely. I will not allow hostility and hatred into this one.
I needed to escape today, to feel the fierce breathe of Winter on my
cheeks. 39 Fahrenheit had to suffice, and it did. I went into the
forest with Pantera,"Primal Concrete Sledge" and left with Chopin;
"Nocturnes Opus 9, No.2."Packing, preparing, organizing. Playing Mario Brothers. I'd wanted to pick the kids up by 6, but they didn't even start dinner until 7. Two households is interesting.
Got the kids, cooler has ice in it & it's in the car, Ethan is bringing the bike, Maggie is bringing the guitar. I'm bringing my last hoorah for La Bodega. I wonder how much I can eat to fill me up for a lifetime. I will miss that place with all my heart...but not the headaches it has caused over the last 4 years.
Pictures: 39 and Marmot's fine; a trail of least resistance; the El Dorado scene.
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