September 6, 2015

This dream was about our New Morning therapist’s office: We walked in and all of the books and “stuff” was gone – cleared away.  Instead, shelving had been put up to store some items.  My “vagina” sticker was gone, discarded.  It had offended some people, even though it was hidden behind a cup.  <This is where I am confused.  How can vagina or penis offend?  I can understand people who have sexually traumatized, as I myself have been, but it is about working past that and becoming strong again.  Work through the shame..work through the guilt.>  ALL of Jen’s stuff was gone, but fortunately the dream ended before she came to work.  This made me look at a few things.  A ) not attempting to throw my views upon others, rather working delicately with them to a resolution.  B) Ask permission, and C) Be grateful (to the person who had bought the shelves, had cleaned up the room).  I love learning from dreams.

I slept until 1:37.  I had gotten up at 8 and put the dogs out, but then fell right back to sleep.  When I awoke, I took more medicine to make my cough more productive. I have slept so much in the past few days and I am anxious to get out, yet after even one client at work, I’d find myself exhausted.  I’m grateful for this long week-end, a time when I can focus on resting on working on my big paper.

My brain was much more focused today than it was yesterday.  Suddenly all those sentences made sense.  It is still difficult to put this together as I have limited information about the client, but I am hitting a lot more on the head than I did yesterday.  I also notice so much more I should have done, but this was my third client and at that point there was no experience on what to do or what was actually taking place.  I should have talked to teachers.  I had no idea he would be moving at the end of the summer, but talking to his current teachers would have given me much more of a reference point of how this client behaved.  I should have spoken with his doctor, which would have given me more insight on additional diagnosis.  I should have run additional assessments.  Now, this far into the trainee-ship, I see why 3,000 hours are needed before licensure testing, because there is so much learned from experience, but oh, to have that possibility back with that client….

It was time.  I needed to go down the hill for baby-buying, but before doing so I wanted to take the dogs out again. We headed back to the same park, where, lo and behold, the same gate was open that I closed yesterday. There were people here this time and so I leashed the dogs up and we headed up to the field.  I noticed Annie’s tail, wagging delightfully the entire time.  Once we were finished – and oh, my I gave Mabi a workout – we headed to Target where I was able to look at the baby registry and got A)  a nursing bra for mom B) pretty barrettes and a hair band for big sister and C) a baby nightgown that you don’t have to snap or button for those 4 a.m. feedings/diaper changes when you are so tired your eyelids won’t even open to figure out which button goes where.  I haven’t yet made the Labor Book, with inspiration sayings from the Halls wrappers I’ve saved, but it’s on the list of Things To Do.

 

I wonder if I get any credit from Jake for all this coughing I am doing.  I think my abs are getting quite toned from it.  My tranny voice has become a whisper, as I think laryngitis has crept into the picture.   It’s really tricky whispering “ANNIE!!!” from one end of a field to a dog who is happily sniffing away….

Pics 'n flicks:  Mabi jumps for the frisbee (she caught it!); The ever unlatched gate; I love the form & color of this tree; Annie and her ever-wagging tail.