February 14, 2016

I'm not usually a dreamer about sex, but the numerous sexual innuendos at last night's show must have influenced my dreams...suddenly there was this *MAN* and my heart was fluttering and he was close to me, about to kiss me and...Maggie's hand touched my shoulder to tell me about a rat in the closet. I am not even kidding.  Can't get kissed in my own dreams. "its a squirrel on the roof, Mags". I heard one the other night.  Here..." and I gave her some earplugs.  By the time I feel asleep again, he was gone.  Next days listened in her closet; she was right-something is in there (I wish I were kidding).

I gave my mom a call and wished her a Happy Valentine's Day.  She had re-homed the new puppy and sadly had put Roxie down on Wednesday.  Her cancer was too bad. There were mentions of talking to the psychic about another pet, yet who am I to laugh?  I'm damn close to talking to own about Switzerland.  I mentioned my troubles...and soon tears poured from my face.   My mom's word search echoed my sister's:  not yet.  Wait, give them a basis in German,  I don’t have to cancel my dream, but put it on hold for a bit.  Plus, she said I should really finfish me hours and get licensed.  Go there, go somewhere for 6 weeks in the summer and experience living them, give the kids a buy-in.  I couldn’t stop crying.  I’m scared…that they are right.

Mags and I headed to her dad’s with both dogs ready for a hike.  Annie was shaking and whine-howling with such excitement; This drives me bonkers and is the main reason who she can never go on a long road trip with us.  Mags laughed and said “Annie is shivering with antici…pation.”   High five, Mags!  She really did enjoy the experience, despite.    After dropping her off,  the pups and I headed to the lake for a hike.  I parked the car and we hit the forest – no path, no trail, until we were down by the lake, walking over very rocky beaches.  I kept noticing bikers and people waking past me on the edge…and soon saw there is a path the circles the entire lake.  Humph.  Who knew?  As I ran (which I actually did for about a mile) a lyrics from an 80s metal band struck a chord, I don’t have to say goodbye to my dream, but perhaps the reason I struggle so much is because it isn’t time yet.  I was at the other side of the lake and I really wanted to sit down and cry, but I had up-late-at-night-hangover and needed to get a good sleep for tomorrow’s Skype session.  

Grocery store where I picked some nice things to eat for myself and the girls and I headed home with Pantera singing.  I will be listening to this stuff when I’m 80.

 I made a cozy fire and enjoyed dinner – surf and turf, home-style.  I chatted with someone as I tuned my guitar and got some suggestions on where to begin.  Again – G, C and A chord (I think – I have it written down).  These metal strings really hurt my fingers and if I’m true to form, I’ll quit just when callouses start.  

Pictures:  A Valentine's Day letter Mags wrote to me;  The Dundee Award my kids got via text (there are chocolates here for them); Our hike; Tuning teh old gee-tar.