March 7, 2016

I’ve reached the point of devastation…the fact that I won’t be going to Europe has become so painfully clear that when I heard a Crowded House song this morning, the tears started rolling down my face.  

I’ve been really down the last week, ever since it became clear that we wouldn't be going.  I decided to make the most of it and start building a home here – looking for a house to buy, planning my career moves, creating a future here,  yet still the gray clouds lurk.

Dropped the kids off and even though it was my day off, I headed to the office so I could get some hours logged in and prog notes written.  Then, it was time head to Jake, who was waiting for me at the gym.  My plan was to get some lifting moves so I could work on weights (which would boot up my metabolism), but Life, it seems had other ideas.  It seems my form is so off that working on my form and stability is the first thing which needs to be worked on.  I followed his lead and stretched out..but dammit.  I just want to get rid of this, yet it seems there is no fast way.

 

Back to work to meet a potential client, and get other things in order…and I spent the next few hours getting my hours logged in.  I am just about at the one/third mark.  I guess I should start studying for my law and ethics exam – that has to be done in the next year.

Home to delicious chicken tortilla soup and the boys.  I’m so tired – such a poor night’s rest last night…why can’t I go to bed at 7:30??

Pictures:  The stickers that are await Little Lizzie Mae Sunshine's arrival;Storm behind, temporary blue sky over head; Adding up my hours.

February 13, 2016

Remembering again and again after waking up to get up for work that it was a Saturday and I could sleep in was paradise.  

I sent a letter to a psychological institute in Zurich to inquire about work; my hopes for Montessori is fading as there are plenty of qualified people there and the fact that I live here – well...I’m not a ‘sure bet’ for them.  

I had a long and heart wrenching talk with my sister on Facetime – a conversation which resulted with me in tears as Truths were told.  I am still trying, however.  If one door closes it doesn’t mean there isn’t an open window somewhere.  Of course, timing is an issue, but nothing is in stone – ever, except Death.

With excitement I picked Maggie up and we headed to go eat, then home to get ready.  So much mousse in my hair to slick it back.  So much light foundation and those chola eyebrows – WOW.  I am not a good gangbanger-bitch, that’s for sure.  They’d be too ashamed to have me around.  Mags looked so beautiful.  The re-purposing of my pantsuit for Hipsmas two years ago did not go as smoothly as I desired, but it got the job done.  We met Angela and Alec at the show, with people lined up all around the theatre.  The beginning was, to put it mildly, nothing like I remembered.  I don’t recall burlesque dancing and I certainly don’t remember the “virgins” (people who were seeing the show for the first time) standing up front and having a contest as to who could produce the best fake orgasm sound.  Mags was dying and I felt her pain.  I would have DIED being in the same place my mom was and hearing that.  Hell, I still would, even today.   There were also sections here and there with overt sexual content (the Brad/Dr. Fran N. Furter sex scene) which I had forgotten about and might have strongly influenced my decision to bring Mags, but what’s done is done.  She enjoyed parts or it – as did I.  I still have no idea how it ended and she had to explain it to me.  It’s so UNlinear.

As we turned onto our street, she noticed out street sign had changed from Pinon (Piñon) to Pinion.  Huh?!?!  When did that happen?  She went off to bed and here I am – so drowsy.  What a night.  “It's not easy having a good time! Even smiling makes my face ache!” ~ Dr. Frank N. Furter

 Pictures: 40th anniversary of RHPS - the longest-running interactive movie ever; Mags and I - Janet and Columbia; Marquee; Alec, Angela and Mags;Me, protecting myself in the rain; THIS guy had THE MOST PUNGENT body odor I have ever smelled.  Mags and I were DYING.....