August 5, 2013

The night was one filled with fear…I’m not sure why.  I recall thinking of those topics which aren’t pleasant, yet I have no control over, and they carried into the morning.  Nervous butterflies traversing my body.  At least I was graced with my favorite sky: overcast and “kinda like Europe” (said Ethan).  Yep.  Kinda like that. A neat part of today was Brandon, that precious baby from so long ago who is soon 22, let me know he had a dream he raided my fridge.  <smile>  The kids thought that was so cool. 

Tried to do homework, but I think I over-coffee’d it and my brain was on warp speed..without a pilot.  Despite all the DBT videos I watched last night, I couldn’t create a vignette.  Instead, I entertained myself while watching Ethan with his smoke bombs and firecrackers (hose was running!).  The plan *really* was to bike to the movies..I thought we’d hit the 2:30 3-D  super heroes flick, whatever that’s called, but then Mags was invited to a friends, and Ethan was totally ok in just hanging out with me ‘cause we always seem to do cool stuff. As Maggie got her chores done (and might I say what a delightful child she is?  Listens, follows direction…it’s interesting), I went  through much of my Montessori stuff (the majority is packed away in boxes).  I still dream about a little school. I just wish my paths would connect.  

I haven't heard from my practicum site yet.  I have about 3 weeks until I (should) start practicum.  I worry that my work is going to interfere with practicum, but without my job I can’t support myself.  This is the tricky part in being a single mom.  Funny, Corby and I talked about the sugardaddy’s web site.  I wonder if I could find a weird wealthy guy who just wants me to WRITE him dirty emails.  Then I could focus on finishing grad school.   Corbs!  Check on it for me, will ya?

The kids and I headed down the hill to buy school supplies before dropping Maggie off to meet up with her friend, but there wasn’t time, so we headed to the Indian Bazaar instead.  I wanted more rajma masala spices and HEM patchouli incense (which they were out of).  On our way to the meeting point, I discussed just moving *somewhere*  with the kids if Europe doesn’t work out:  Panama, Costa Rica.  They’re game for it.  Well… they *say* they are.  Ethan and I headed to Target…didn’t even finish the list and I’m already $136 in.  Oh my…I sure do miss my paycheck!  Home,  a lovely Indian dinner for two with naan bread and rajma masala.  Food is good.  We loaded up the bikes and headed out.  Since there was no trip to the theater, we did a 5 mile trek for the first time in over a year.  Along the trail, Ethan suggested we buy some good bikes when we live in Europe and go biking a lot.  I smiled.  Off to the park with the pups then, for a little tennis with Mabi.  Annie just runs after her.  Those dogs really have fun together.  

Once we got home for the evening, Ethan and I made some more homemade granola, since I’m almost out.  I also noticed my thighs are aching.  Neglect the poor things for so long and then ultra shock in the last week.  Ethan is listening to his music now and I’m planning on another biking adventure for us tomorrow after training at work(unless the vignette is due Thursday evening).  Thursday is day one for work …  Didn’t even manage a backpacking trip this summer.  <sigh>  

Picture: Cairns kids and I built at Folsom Lake