January 17, 2015

My  kids tease me for my love of sleep, but ohhh, come Saturday mornings, I am making good on my word by absorbing every possible second.  I stayed in bed until I knew doing so any longer would simply waste too much of that damn precious time and then I made my list of What To Do.  I have found doing this on the white board I used for school schedules is beneficial as I get 90% of it completed.  The main project today was scanning practicum paperwork to Dr. Weber, which involved installing “computer stuff.”   Done!  <but don't call me the new Steve Jobs yet)

My sister phoned just as I was going to phone her – initially it was just audio, but Ingrid wanted to “see” me, so I called back via Facetime.  I miss that little girl….  She “took me into her room” and we hung out there.  I talked, I sang, she put the phone on “pause” (but figured it out again).   It was such fun.  Talked to Olivia, who looks like a million dollars and she just had a baby.  When I told them I was about to take the dogs to the park, Ingrid said she wanted to come with us.  I wish so much that we lived closer to one another.  Took the dogs to the park – Mabi had fun dribbling her basket ball.  Annie leaps over her like an ice skater in the midst of a routine.  Took them home, off to downtown Placerville.

I had one gift for Lindsay, but I wanted to get another for her.  Saw one of the Union Mine kids with her family…she is a swimmer and such a sweet girl.  For the life of me, though, I can’t remember her name.  Headed down the hill to Sky Sushi – our traditional eating spot.  There was a mist in the air – cloaking everything and adding a tinge of UnReal to the air.  The dinner was wonderful as always – I enjoy these events with Lindsay, Brian and Sophia.  I can’t believe I managed to eat 6 gyozas, 3 sushi rolls and bites of Lindsay’s birthday cake.  That scares me.  On the flip side, by not getting a to-go box, I didn’t contribute to the Styrofoam waste issue. <silver lining>

Once at home, I got back to cleaning out and throwing away – except this time it was much harder.  I went through paperwork and pictures.  I found my God Can from rehab in 1993…pictures of me & C – remembering those turbulent years together.  Then I found a torn up business card, which I almost discarded, then didn’t, because seeing it reminds me of the life  he pushed me into.  These  are a reminder for me and I never want to forget.  I also found a heart wrenching letter from Ethan to L – talking about how upset he was that L was spending the night at his girlfriend’s house.  As much as L and I tried to make the divorce as gentle for the kids as we could – divorce so often tears up the lives of kids.  I cannot say that how I did things were perfect for the kids, either, but I made sure to talk to them – about almost everything.  Keeping kids in the loop helps make things easier for them.  All too often adults think kids wouldn’t understand - so tell them in a way they can understand.  

I have a small house – I have too much stuff.  I hatehatehate this mindset of buying unnecessary things and am trying to simplify.  My life is best when it is uncomplicated and uncluttered.  I do not need things, I do not require stuff as I have all I need.  I’m a pretty contented camper.  Just need to get a little more active to lose the additional heat source I’ve acquired (I saw old bikini tops this morning – I would need 2 tops to cover one boob, things have gotten a little to “exaggerated” ). 

 Pictures:  Ingrid talks to me on Face Time; Stunning Sun rays at the park' Lindsay's birthday celebration!; Jalapenos on sushi - add melted cheese for nacho sushi and now we're talking...