My back woke up in the middle of
the night. No gentle nuzzles or soft
"I love you for trying to care for me" rather, it was a good swift
kick in the ...lower back region. And
joy of joys, it was accompanied by more ovarian pain. This "aging process" is no longer
welcome. I thought my morning could be a
gentle one, until I remembered I have to make Glühwein (n/a style, of course)
and a German potato salad for a student.
Yoga was thus suspended.
I walked into work carrying all
sorts of bags, ‘n bowls ‘n plans for a fantastic day. It was Thursday, a day of 3 groups for
me. Unfortunately, there is something in
the air or drinking water or something as
everyone seems to be going crazy (myself included). By second block (after a delicious potato
salad…the Glühwein wasn’t to my liking), I was ready to book it and leave. That isn’t good modeling, I suppose, but
seriously. Add to that back pain and the
stupid, stupid idea to wear my cowboy
boots…Ohhellno. By day’s end I had
walked 7 and a half miles. That is some
serious pain.
Post-work, I was able to witness the
cherry on top of the ice-cream (or whatever that phrase is) – a kid, whom I
have known for yeaarrrsss is suddenly a slick cool badass and always wears his
pants so damn low. Well, today, Gravity
played her hand and down they came. I
was fortunate enough to be walking past him, chuckled and quietly said “I’ve
been wondering when that was going to happen.” I’m not sure he heard, which is
just as well as he also has an attitude (it is probably from the pain of all those
heavy gold necklaces he wears). Off to
group two, wear I realized that some kids have a bad attitude because they have
parents who tell them to fuck off.
Please think about this when you see a kid who has a horrific attitude –
the home life may be four times as bad.
After being told that I “fit right
in” at my site, I zoomed off to group three where I also realized that some
parents are dealt a really bad hand with kids.
All in all, I was so damn grateful for the hand I was given. I had a talk with my mom yesterday and numerous
misunderstandings on her part took place.
At this point, when I feel that twinge of resentment (I've had decades of
poor relations with at least one member of my family of origin), I stop that instinct
to engage and just say, “ok.” It isn’t
easy, at all. Yesterday’s
misunderstandings came over moving to Europe and my tentative plans. I think she forgets I am fairly capable and
have managed a great deal without the financial flow she has had all these
years. Today, I received a message from
her which I took to be a sort of apology – she suggested I look into teaching
at boarding schools in Switzerland (she doesn’t seem to remember that my plan
is to work in therapy, however, the gesture was appreciated).
Which leads me to another
terrifying “Universe Message”: people
keep mentioning all these teaching positions which have opened up here. This would be nice in clearing my credential,
but I am 5 classes away from finishing my dual masters in a whole other field. Granted, clearing the credential opens up more
for me in Europe (as teachers are paid up to four times more than here since
education is worth something in other lands) (and yes, that was a snarky
comment towards US education), but holy shite, really? Two more years of school for BTSA? Shoot me now.
Pictures: And he was also wearing Wranglers and cowboy boots. Some of these CA boys are alright; My favorite football field oak.
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