July 24, 2015

Last night, after my big adoption post and pics, someone messaged me and commented asked how I could be so open about my life (in the very nicest way possible).   My opinion, for what it’s worth, is that if more people were open and honest, the world would look a little differently than it does now.  I do not throw all-sorts-of-everything (well, sometimes I do) at my kids, but they are aware of what the world is like and how society works.  I think shame and guilty feelings are increased when we hide information – whether to “protect” ourselves or others, and talking about it takes the power away, is therapeutic, cathartic and invites further healing.  

Can I tell you how delicious coffee was?  Oh, my, even though it was a quick up and out (of bed into shower into car to work), the morning was a good one.  I felt emotionally lighter.  Client session went well –work was just snappy – I knew what to do, and what needed to be done...it was terrific as all the synapses were firing and hitting targets every time.  

Headed to my Assessment At The Gym and was “watched” by my “trainer”, Jake.  I am going to try my best not to make a “Body By Jake*” joke/comment to him, so I will do it a great deal here, FYI.  I think I did pretty well, considering, and believe that underneath all my “protection padding”, I’m still in fairly good shape.  I may have blown his mind...I doubt it, but it is possible.  He will be giving me food lists, etc., working with me,  and even told me my goal (ultimately 30 lbs but in the next 3 months, 10 lbs) will be easily accomplished.   Watch out for my Body by Jake* - in stores (or music venues) near you soon.

I headed to my doctor appointment, and then…about an hour after meeting with Jake, I stopped something very important:

Farewell: A Poem of Loss – a “Done in 6 Minutes Recapture of The Love of a Lifetime”

My sweetest, dear carnita,

 I just had to come and eatcha.

I knew this was goodbye,

For no longer can I try

To lie about your health,

As I eat you with great stealth.

Your juices add to my girth,

And for me it isn’t worth,

The pain that it does cause,

When I try to put on my clothes.

My size sixes are now double digits

The shame, I cannot bridge it.

So, this is it for a while,

I ate you with a smile.

After The Last Carnita, I headed back to work for a group at 4, and then…home, grabbed the dogs and we headed into the hills.  The smell of those TREES!!!  It is so glorious!  Reminds me of long-agos….  I do get a bit antsy in this area, however, because this place has sorts of roads and areas where “things” could be grown or “cooked.”   Plus, I hear rumors and reports from law enforcement about Mexican Mafia and have seen evidence of Russian Mafia, so I’m loudish when I walk with the dogs, singing Mother Hips or Zeppelin or Foo Fighters or CRB or whatever. On the way back down the hill, after our long hike, my car stopped in front of Shilla – again!!  And so….

Farewell, Two:  Haikus of Loss

You showed me, ago

The difference between right

And even more right.

Eating All-You-Can

Is costlier than two rolls

Which is all I eat.

Thus, fried gyoza

Is a perfect solution

For my dilemma.

Sushi, sushi, yum.

I do love sushi so much,

But must say goodbye.

My Body By Jake

Awaits to be discovered

So I say farewell.

I felt I had a strong string of farewells with my foods of love.  Jake would be a little disappointed in me.  I can really talk a good talk.  Yet once I get started on my workouts (which begin tomorrow), I can’t put all that yummy stuff in me.  Hopefully I’ll be called away to South America during cranberry season.  I sat in bed, after a groovy chat with Mags, and received a message from Brandon – the most incredible, heart-warming letter.   This is what parenting is, to me! Children are not "ours"  - we do what we can to provide them with the best life possible so they can become strong, dependable, responsible adults who can think critically and make help make this world a little better than they found it.   Parenting is giving a child the wings they need so they can go (sometimes very early on) to lead a Good Life, yet parents should also be a foundation, of sorts, so the children shall wish to return.  1/3 there....  <3

Pictures:  My tree protectors in the forest;  sunflowers make me happy (so does sunshine on my shoulders, but that's neither here nor there); More forest; Forest shots; Gluttonous sushi shot; My children <3