September 30, 2014

By the time the kids were up, I was high from Led Zeppelining.  Or perhaps it was the fact that I fit

into my Eddie Bauer pants, which were snug in parts (for me... I’m not a fan of amorous pants who try to get "there", even in my situation), but there was no dromedary action, so why not? 

Until I got to school, after dropping kids off.  Sitting in snug pants and standing in them are two entirely separate things, and my regions are not accustomed to pressure of any kind, yet still, it was a monumental occasion, so I was going to make it work.  Until I ripped the pocket area while trying to stretch out the cotton....at school...where I have no “emergency clothes” stored.  Still, it wasn’t a huge rip, and my shirt was long enough to easily cover it.  The day was a poke-yourself-in-the-eye-with-a-sharp-pencil day all the way around, though.  Let’s just leave it at that.

Picked up Ethan first at 4:30 and It Started.  I’m not even really sure what happened other than before I knew it, he was “Gawd, all you ever do is focus on my bad stuff – you never focus on the good stuff!” (?!?!?!) and off he stomps outside with tears in his eyes.  HUH????  I spent time talking with Tatjana, who gave me suggestions (“My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father.  Prepare to die.”) and then she came outside with me and talked with Ethan (who was sitting on a bench) for half an hour!!!  She worked with him, asking all the right things, in the right way, in a way I just can’t with him.    I wish I could have filmed it for future similar incidents (as I have a strong feeling this will not be the only such occurence).    Ethan was very angry, feeling very miserable and in a very NOT-HAPPY-WITH-SELF-OR-ANYONE-ELSE state of mind, yet she satyued.  And spoke gently with him.  He felt (feels) stupid, incapable and just.plain.bad.  It’s tough when you don’t understand it and then have everyone on your back.  Poor guy has an IEP coming up, too, but it truly is in his best interest and I PRAY things ease up for him, that he realizes how incredibly bright he is, that he is a deep thinker and goes to levels others his age don't.  My Indigo child.

We worked on homework for quite sometime.  I organized his school work (which I do all day, anyway), I worked with him getting answers down.  It was much less painful than I expected. Regarding his history,  I even was able to show him the church in Zurich I visited which has the original statue of Charlemagne in the crypt ( I have the booklets from Zurich).  But then I got homesick that we weren’t there and couldn’t go see it live.  Sent Ethan to go read Agatha Christie’s “Three Blind Mice” (he fell asleep on page 6) and was requested to read Harry Potter to Maggie.  So now I have an 8 page paper to write this weekend, but I am concerned as I have a boy who needs serious one-on-one.  Then I got a call from his dad...ooooohhhhhhhh, myyyyyyyyyyy.  :-/

Looking like Hardly Strictly Bluegrass <Luukkkaaassss!!!>

is indeed a wash this year – volleyball tourney and massive homework.  I’ll be luck to make it to ML Saturday night for another kid who needs a little support, but I’ll try.  Thank gawd I’m energized with all that damn salad.  <really wanting some LB nachos right now>  I'm ready for a rainy, drizzly October and I 'd also like to visit South America.

Pictures: Drunk gnomes in the front yard; Another flight of stairs successfully descended; Homework

September 29, 2014

I got up quietly to yoga (which is still without sound.  More on this later), and then I tip-toed around to make my butter coffee w/out disturbing dogs. IT is a sad, sad, SAD day when you are tip-toeing around your dogs so they won’t start whining (Also more on that later).  I read a very interesting article on Islam and the terror group being completely unrelated, which is how I've always seen them, yet far too many people believe Islam includes beheadings.  Such ignorance.  Religions are SO different!  Just as THIS type of Christianity is completely different form THAT type of Christianity.  IT DOESN’T MEAN THEY BELIEVE THE SAME!!!!  

The day was, essentially, a good one.  I got a call from my daughter first thing this morning (after I was at work, of course), letting me know she had a scrimmage immediately after school and I HAD to pick her up at CMP and drive her to Buckeye (a good 3 minute walk from school).  <Hrmphghdghgdg>  I  do tend to take things FAR too personally from one individual, and I suppose this is my lesson (The Four Agreements – Never take anything personally).  During the day, I was pleased to have made it down the stairs  yet again without falling.  Mind you, I do not recall ever falling down a fligt of stairs, but that simply means I’m one step closer. <grin>  I got a call from the bank, apparently there was no “good citizen”, rather the ATM kept the card when I didn’t take it out.  Bell rang, I’m out the door to daughter’s school where I wait, and wait.  And. Wait. Annnd WAIT.   No Maggie.  “I think she’s at volleyball!”  Hunhh??  I drive to the school- where there is no Maggie.  Back to CMP.  Park the car.  Stomp up the steps.  <can you tell I’m getting annoyed?>  It is believed Mags is with volleyball in the back..waiting to be walked to the other school.  Sweet child.  ASK and ADULT.  Then, ask another one and make sure they are both saying the same thing, but always check your sources.  Hrmphhh.  Now I have to miss the first part of the game to go get my bank card.  I had watched part of scrimmage and then picked up Ethan from tutoring and we were back at volleyball.  “The Eye of the Tiger” came on and I excitedly asked Ethan if he wanted to perform a dance with me on half court.  He groaned and said, “please…nooooo…”  I smiled and told him I was just kidding, I’d never do anything like that.  He looked me dead in the eye and said, “Yes, you would.”  I am thrilled to have proven myself to my kids. 

 

 It was a tough call.  As the mom, I could’ve just said taqueria and that is it, but hey do have heavenly pizza at Pizza Bene, so in good form I flipped the quarter and when I lost, I was honest about it.  We had a spectacular time.  I was able to threaten their lives if they fail to use the trash cans in their rooms in the  future.  We were sitting near two older gentlemen and I delighted in S.E.ing them(slightly eavesdropping).  Their conversation was so interesting, about the United States government ( “interesting” & “U.S. Gov’t” - oxymoron, I know), the D.o.D., France, Etc.    After the men left, I told my children that, above all, always have the greatest of respect for our elderly, because they have lived in an era unmatched by any other in human history and have experienced so many great things that we cannot fathom.  They are disciplined, have a strong work ethic and are so giving of themselves.  

 I later had a talk with Ethan about his homework and how things MUST change.  I mentioned the importance of taking notes at least 7 times since I’ve picked him up at school.

  I’ve talked about studying, and writing, and participating.  I also listened about Clash of the Clans, and even asked several questions, but the bottom line is, that kid needs to put more effort into school.  We re-bonded later as he tried helping with the TV/DVD player (which he unplugged in the first place).  We can't seem to get it and L won't return my texts.  This is getting very frustrating as I want to expand my yoga practice.

Once we were at home – the unthinkable happened:  ANNIE PEED RIGHT THERE!!!!!  <Me pointing to the Persian rug> .  So the one pees, the other shits. <I.Am.Going.To.SCREAM>    The plan was to read  Greek mythology to the kids.  (BTW, they were NOT impressed with the little table with folding sides and said they could easily make me one If they just had the right parts.  Then they said, “I thought we were supposed to be getting rid of stuff for when we move to Europe.  True.  But this gives me more money in my kickass “Moving to Europe Yard Sale.”  We read a bit about the basis for the myths, Zeus and Hera.  I love reading to my kids.

I said goodnight to my beloved offspring.  The way I did so with Maggie this time was in the role of Edith Bunker from “All in the Family” singing “Do You Love Me?” From Fiddler on the Roof.  I NAILED IT!!! Penny…if I was back in Texas, you and I would rock those plays. <I totally went on the wrong career path>

 

Pictures: A gargoyle in watches over Placerville;  Number 11 for the CMP Hawks; Ethan ponders at Pizza Bene;  Post-Season Giants colors, alive and well in floral placements.

Now I can't get rid of the underline option. <mad> 

September 28, 2014

 

It was a very quiet night.  I really think Annie is happy to have her own space.  As bullyish as Mabi is, I can see why.  She’s a great big sister, but she sure could use an ass- whoopin’.

I woke up early this morning, thanks to a text, but ended up being quite grateful  for the early awakening….  I, quite honestly, do not remember what happened this morning.  Did I do yoga?  I could swear I remember focusing on a pose in daylight, but who knows.  I did know that I decided to clean my room today and holy gawd, the domino effect took place HARD.  The first part was sorting my books.  I love my books, I feel such attachment to them.  I’m quite saddened, however, that at this point in my life, the words make little sense and are simply floating symbols.  Hope to return to my book reading days when I do not have to cite references.

From there, I went to Ethan’s room.  I have been telling that boy for over a year to clean off his shelves, so today I took the liberty of doing so, myself.  I also almost called CPS on him for endangering himself with trash and filth behind his bed.  I’ll save that little threat for next time. <grin>  Into Maggie's room, who keeps a pretty neat space – until I noticed the same thing behind her bed.  WHAT THE FUCK?!?  Where the hell do these kids learn this nonsense?  I certainly never did it.  I DID have an experience once, cleaning a house when I was newly sober in ’93 at a woman’s house and she had a mess of used tissues behind her bed.  I did not go back to this job.  Gross.  An adult woman who can't throw used tissue in a waste receptacle????  Ok, I realize I'm being judgmental.  Then I put tools away, cleaned out the garage (what we call our carport), worked on the back, did something in the kitchen (oh, yeah, ate salad) and decided to head downtown with the pups where they were having an antique sale.

Sadly, I saw the cutest little table with fold down sides and little drawers, so I had to get it.  Now I have to fit “refinish” into my life as well.  Shit.  Sadly, for the first time ever, I left my bank card in the atm.  Bad moment.  Though I discovered later that whoever found it had already called in to the bank to cancel it.  I LOVE GOOD CITIZENS!!!!  I walked around the fair a bit, got a little cast iron pan and talked to the man for a while (I love cast iron).  He told me to return later and talk with him more.  <sigh>  Nice enough man, but no thank you.  I suck.  Walked the dogs back up hill to the home front to get the car.  I also decided it couldn’t hurt to go grab a book or two at The Bookery (this is where I discovered I'd lost my card).   I was short 1.60, but he said just drop it off next time.  Book lovers are awesome people (btw, I purchased a book on Greek and Roman mythology to read to the kids and a book on symbolism (!!!!)).  I love symbolism.

I also met the man who is running for city council again.  He was by here yesterday and we spoke for quite sometimes, again.  It is nice getting questions answered.  He seems to have all his ducks in a row and I like his standings on local issues.  I put his sign in my front yard.  What next…?  Ummm… I came home cooked more (matzo ball soup, which reminds me of Knödel Suppe).  Very yummy.  Managed to squeak out my homework, have to write up notes for group and shall then die.  I have gotten more accomplished today than in the last 4 months.

Pictures: Placerville's old alley way; The Bookery and my treasures; The new old table; my CLEANED bookshelves!!  Well...2 of them..Have about 4 more to do in the house.

September 27, 2014

I slept til 10 again this weekend.  This push throughout the week is proving itself and by Friday around 8, my body says “done”…granted, I’m up till around 11 or so, but I am getting a good 11 hours of ZZZs.  I had a lot of plans today – the main one being a meeting with the puppy trainer at 1 and then a trip to recovery at 8.  In the meantime, since I hadn’t heard from anyone, I decided to spend the day cleaning, namely the carpet.  It doesn’t smell, but despite immediate cleaning, there is still a nice dotted pattern and if I ever want people over, I’d like to be rid of that.

However, before I could get started, I heard from someone very dear to me who had experienced a major breakup in his life.  I felt so honored that he opened up to me and was sharing his heartache with me.  Sadly, as heartaches do, there is no magic solution, yet I hope I left some words of comfort.

Close to one, I headed towards Cameron Park.  While waiting at a stoplight (and this really is how my brain works, so bear with me), I noticed someone crossing over the double yellow line to get to the turning lane ahead, as the row of cars waiting proved too long to access it from his position.  That got me thinking (duh) about my own fears in “crossing over the double yellow line” in my life…often waiting longer than necessary (when it is “safe”) instead of taking a risk.  I find it amusing, for lack of a better term, that I took risks all too often with my life doing things that were wrong or bad for me, yet when it comes to the good stuff (like finding an appropriate job where I can use the skills I am learning and possible even make more money), I hesitate…because  working in education is comfortable since  I’ve done it since I finished my bachelor’s degree.    Headed on, picked up crickets for Violet and hooves for the dogs, then to Petco where I was the only person there, so I got 1-on-1 treatment.  Since I don’t have “normal” puppy problems (of course I don’t.  Have I ever had a “normal” dog??? ---btw, I DO realize that this all points directly to me), we talked about solutions and yes, a crate was an option.  I was to return later with Annie to fit the correct-sized crate, but first I bought a gallon of Nature’s Miracle.

At home, I am happily dumping NM all over the stains…cleaning Mabi’s crate, preparing the area where the crates (and dogs) shall now be residing.  I also made more soup, listening to classical music and felt BEAUTIFUL.  When I listen to classical music, my life becomes a storybook…it EXPLODES into a fairy tale when there is sudden rain.    I have been doing this salad yoga thing for about a month, yet suddenly overnight my body is changing.  I like it. As it got closer to crate-fit-time, I decided to take Mabi along for the ride. She would go nuts if I left her alone…she’s already going kinda nuts.  Through effective and expert canine psycho-analysis earlier, I came to the conclusion that Mabi, with her wily ways, is the one leaving many of the “gifts” for me.  Annie just does it because she thinks it’s ok, since alpha dog is doing it.  **Note – later that night, when I’d just gotten home, I wasn’t responding to Mabi’s pleas to throw the ball fast enough so she PEED RIGHT THERE (I’m pointing to the carpet)!!!  I know it wasn’t Annie, because she’d gone to her crate to chew on a hoof!

As promised, I headed to MotherLode AA for the 8 o’clock meeting.  Saw quite a few new faces (which is to be expected as I haven’t been there in about a year), but more faces that I knew.  I was also thrilled to see the person I was meeting saunter in.  It’s tough for anyone trying to get into recovery, because it happens when your life has gone to hell and you are trying desperately to regain any semblance of hope, but it is damn hard when you’re a teenager.  I was thrilled that, after my stern suggestion in getting a sponsor, he got one during break.  You know, I am so lucky to have made it not once, but twice.  I won’t say I’ve got this down for the rest of my life, but I am thrilled that, despite going out and living Life, I have not seen it necessary to drink.  I can be around it all day long (and often am at music fests), but I have the ability to play that tape all the way through and am still not at the point where I believe I can “just have one” (to all you people that just have one, you are WEIRD).  It was a terrific evening, I headed home, did some more quiet yoga (though at night, there are no roosters, so I’m cock-less, which is the story of my life…)  And on that happy note, I bid you a good evening.

Pictures:  Mt. Ralston hike, Desolation Wilderness 11-10-13.