March 11, 1016

A rainy morning – definitely a cowboy boot day.

Glided into work, feeling good.  There are FEW plans for this weekend, which I like.  Lots of calls and sessions.  I like the supervisor.  He’s a funny guy.

At 3, I was out – bought some Einkorn flour (yes, bad plans), went to the GO for some groceries.  This is where the homeless folks who frequent this area come when it’s raining…their pungent smells as they shuffle around with grocery carts -  trying to stay dry for just a little bit.  I don’t know what they do with the items they put in that cart because they have no cash to buy them.  I have learned about homeless pride though – and so I go about my way.

 

Once home, I threw an Amy’s pizza in the oven and concocted my cranberry magic (just a little piece).  One second thought, I shouldn’t have thrown that butter in the mix – it had garlic in it, which I discovered when I ate the CC.

Gathering items for Hipnic.  My 4 days of heaven– more like 3 this time because of Brian and Lindsay’s wedding that Monday, but that’ll be nice, too. 

Pictures: A boot day; I need a bigger bus; Reading The Body Keeps The Sccore, by Bessel Van Der Kolk.  VERY interesting on trauma and teh brain.

March 10, 2016

4:38 – WHY do I bother going to bed early?  Dropped my babies off at school after an incredible morning.  My boy will be 14 on Sunday – Hope he has fun with L.

Off to work where there were a few referrals.  I enjoy this facility – I enjoy these kids.  I know I won’t make a huge impact or change in their lives, but I hope that just for a moment, they will see that someone really cares about them.

Supervision with a social worker at work – this man is incredible and I really like him.  He is so knowledgeable in his field – plus he and I share something in common.  

I headed home, exhausted.  It was a long 10 hour day, but I had this thought of sushi in my mind.  I went to my place – and got to listen to men talk about shooting elephants and women talking about make-up – one topic so disturbing and the other topic so vapid.

Home where I spoke with a real estate agent who was recommended to me by J-Berr, my gangsta colleague.  Wheels are rolling.

Pictures: One of the most stunning sights I've seen of Wicked Tree this morning - so breathtaking; I can't wear these in here...; This makes me think of my "grown up" Ethan.

March 9, 2016

Yoga is SO GOOD for my body.  I stretch, my body feels happy – the appetite is resuming healthily.  I’ve always known it was the answer.

This morning was a CRB morning with some “Burn Slow” because holy hell my heart is hurting. I wanted SO BADLY to give my kids this incredible perspective of Europe – of seeing life differently than is this blinder-led life of frickin’ El Dorado-Hickville-County (is it obvious I am nota fan?). 5 more years in this place and I’m out.  Shit…5 more years…  

Client didn’t show, so I called mom to check in, checked in with parents of other clients – all sorts of grown-up responsible stuff.  I think today is an extension of yesterday’s grownupness. A colleague then uttered a sentence which threw everything into “WOW”ness: "I can't put down a V code under Axis I as a primary, can I?"  That’s a damn fine sentence, colleague.  Thank you.

Rush to juvie for a LONG meeting, rush back to NM for a new client assessment, and then…

Home.  Where my beloved son made baked chicken for me.  No sides (he said I didn’t have anything..guess that white brain-looking hunk of something was playing hid & seek again), but that’s ok, as I didn’t have time to eat my spinach leaves at work, so I had that.  Sold my Hips ticket to a friend to prepare for my big SF night out with my girl.  It’s all good.

Picture: Again - no pics today, so here is last night's fun: creating VW bus stickers.  Jesus is pronounced in teh Spanish form as I have a love affair with Mexican food.  Hell, yes.

March 8, 2016

An early departure so Mags could pick up some doughnuts for friends (and herself).  On the way we listened to classical music, which we have been doing as of late – the boy tends to lean towards Russian folk influence.  The girl is open to any style, I think. 

Busy day today – oh my….  Site work, which notified me of an IEP on Monday.  I think my Mondays’ off are no more – I’m throwing myself into this to emerge myself as much as I can.  

A tele-psych session with a long-ago classmate who struggles with many issues.  Suddenly this grown-up lady who knew what she was talking about emerged from my mouth.  Like I told Trish at the school site – “I’m doing all sorts of grown-up things today….”

A quick pick up and drop off so I could meet my late clients at work.  I’m thinking I need to add a bit of fun in there for the young one.  

At home I sat with the boy (the girl was busy and didn’t come out to greet me for 3 hours).  We looked at various houses for sale.  I’m wondering about foreclosure homes or a fixer-upper with is now bank-owned.  I’ve never bought a home before.  Holy shit, so much grown-upness in one day.

Picture: I took none today  -this was a screen shot of what Ethan is looking for (birthday is coming up) which I texted to L, which Ethan saw.  I have lost my sneaky abilities.

March 7, 2016

I’ve reached the point of devastation…the fact that I won’t be going to Europe has become so painfully clear that when I heard a Crowded House song this morning, the tears started rolling down my face.  

I’ve been really down the last week, ever since it became clear that we wouldn't be going.  I decided to make the most of it and start building a home here – looking for a house to buy, planning my career moves, creating a future here,  yet still the gray clouds lurk.

Dropped the kids off and even though it was my day off, I headed to the office so I could get some hours logged in and prog notes written.  Then, it was time head to Jake, who was waiting for me at the gym.  My plan was to get some lifting moves so I could work on weights (which would boot up my metabolism), but Life, it seems had other ideas.  It seems my form is so off that working on my form and stability is the first thing which needs to be worked on.  I followed his lead and stretched out..but dammit.  I just want to get rid of this, yet it seems there is no fast way.

 

Back to work to meet a potential client, and get other things in order…and I spent the next few hours getting my hours logged in.  I am just about at the one/third mark.  I guess I should start studying for my law and ethics exam – that has to be done in the next year.

Home to delicious chicken tortilla soup and the boys.  I’m so tired – such a poor night’s rest last night…why can’t I go to bed at 7:30??

Pictures:  The stickers that are await Little Lizzie Mae Sunshine's arrival;Storm behind, temporary blue sky over head; Adding up my hours.